To be Perfectly Imperfect.

Today, I am tired of stereotypes and I am fed up with expectations.Today, I am thankful for independence and keeping an open mind. Today, I am thankful for my ability to be "Me".

I am completely and utterly strange. I talk to candy… "come to Mama, you delicious ball of chocolate”. I cry for absolutely no reason and spend a majority of my time concocting unlikely fairytale scenarios in my head. I drive too fast and I cuss too much. I get far too excited about others misfortunes in scary movies. I am wanty, needy and in love with all things material. I look in the mirror and think my hips are too high and my thighs too thin and would honestly pursue some fake tata's if I wasn't so skeptical about unnecessary surgeries. I know there are times when I am obnoxiously inappropriate and shouldn’t be…like at a funeral. I spend the weekdays carrying myself with an air of class and confidence but I love a Friday night in a smoke filled room with a beer in my hands and a band playing. My children are always my first priority but I do not feel guilty about having a life outside of being a Mother, I don’t want my girls to think that being a woman who does nothing but stay at home and tend to children is acceptable, I want more for them. I constantly worry about money, my dream is to one day be so set that I no longer stress from check to check. I want to give more of myself than I can, there are not enough hours in the day for all of my ambitions. I could be a better friend, I have such wonderful people in my life and I feel that I should give them more of myself but I am already spread so thin between working and the Children. There are occasions…albeit rare…when I ruin dinner, order a pizza and then cry over breadsticks because I am not society’s definition of Susie Homemaker. I have become completely satisfied with life as it is, it doesn’t mean that I don’t want more, it just means I am no longer feeling as if I am lacking. I am blessed. I get moody; one week out of the month I am a horrible monstrous bitch…but, I am currently fixing that. I have not forgotten where I came from, I am well aware I grew up in a trailer in a Podunk town and wasn’t quite middle class. It’s hard to forget things like that, that’s why I appreciate everything I have and why I always want to provide more for my children, they will never be the kids in the payless shoes. I would get into my love life...but I will spare everyone that, just know it is far from perfect itself. Although currently, I am very happy and complete despite the fact that things aren’t ideal. I am judgmental, Lord forgive me for it, I know it is wrong but sometimes I can’t help but say, “what the fuck”. My confidence can be off putting to some people, but I have a warmth that makes little girls cling to me like a dryer sheet…and I love that, I am very much a Mother of girls. There are things about me that no one knows and plenty I am sure that people don’t understand. I am not perfect. I don’t want to be perfect. I am me, and as long as I am happy with myself I could honestly care less what a person here or there has to say. I try to live my life in an acceptable manner, I am nauseatingly responsible but I refuse to be dull in order to be someone’s definition of perfect. I am no one’s toy, I am a woman. I don’t think it is right to let a man control you. While I think respect is important, you are just as capable as him and should not live to be a baby factory and maid, you are an equal and should be treated as such. I will do your dishes, but I will do them for me, not because I am a woman and you are a man. I am lucky to be in a relationship where this is not an issue, I am a princess and treated as such, which has led me to the realization I should never settle for less than that. “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you” and then if they aren’t holding up their end….do unto others as they do unto you. That’s right, you can do it, go ahead and feel your backbone…it’s still there. There is absolutely nothing wrong with not being a “Pinterest Perfect” woman. There is beauty in difference, there is character in it. Just be a good person, be a good partner and be the best parent you can…now that, sounds perfectly imperfect.

I am quite certain this message would be approved,
With Love From Betty.